Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
