i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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