I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
do herpes really smell.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
