Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
