they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
