I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
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