she smelled like a LAN party
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
