You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize