You're completely useless in the revolution.
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
