smell my finger.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
