let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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