watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
