Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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