super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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