So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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