so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
