If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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