Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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