Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
