I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
In other news, I just burned my penis
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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