How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
