Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
How does one acquire holy water?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Randomize
