his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Randomize
