On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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