Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
