I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Can I color on your dick again?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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