Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
this just has baby written all over it
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
