Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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