quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I can't trust your balls anymore.
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