If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
