He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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