just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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