It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
it's great music for shaving your balls
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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