we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
So much rum. So many feels.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
