I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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