he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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