Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
