How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
