Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize