grandma shit on top of the toilet
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
