Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
