the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
