Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
