Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
