Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
