Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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