she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
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