check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
