I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
