what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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