Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
